The Wet Blanket Effect
Are you smothering the fire?
It’s been a while, over a year, actually— since I last wrote to you. I’ve thought about this community often, and today, I just wanted to reach out, check in, and say… how are you doing?
How's life been treating you? with your family, your career, your dreams? I hope you've been growing, thriving, and finding reasons to smile even on the hard days.
As for me, life’s been full. Between career shifts, new opportunities, personal and business growth, and simply navigating the ups and downs of life, I found myself needing to step back for a while. But I’ve missed writing to you, missed sharing ideas, encouragement, and learning together.
Today felt like the perfect time to reconnect, not just to say hello, but also to share something that's been on my heart recently. Earlier this month, while attending a class through the African Leadership and Management for Impact in Malaria Eradication (ALAMIME), I came across a concept that made me stop and reflect: the Wet Blanket Effect.
As we discussed it, I realized just how often it plays out in our everyday lives — sometimes without us even noticing. I felt like I had to share it with you, because whether we know it or not, we’ve all been there: either as the ones feeling discouraged or, unintentionally, as the ones doing the discouraging.
Have you ever shared exciting news with someone, only for their reaction to completely deflate your excitement? Or been in a meeting where fresh ideas were met with immediate skepticism instead of support? That’s the wet blanket effect — when negativity, doubt, or a lack of enthusiasm puts out someone’s fire.
While honest feedback is important, constant pessimism can crush creativity, lower morale, and hold back progress. And it happens everywhere — at home, at work, in school, even in church. Let’s look at some real-life examples and how we can avoid being the wet blanket in the room.
At Home: The Dream Killer Syndrome
Home should be the one place where dreams are nurtured. But sometimes, without realizing it, we become dream killers:
A child says they want to be an astronaut, and the response is, “Dey play, Be serious. Pick something realistic.”
A spouse shares a business idea, and instead of support, they hear a long list of why it won’t work.
A sibling picks up a new hobby, and the first reaction is sarcasm.
Over time, these reactions chip away at confidence and creativity. Instead, imagine how powerful it would be to say, "That sounds exciting! Tell me more about it." Simple encouragement can make all the difference.
At Work: The Silent Productivity Killer
Workplaces need innovation and collaboration to thrive, but the wet blanket effect can quietly tear teams apart:
A new employee pitches a fresh idea, only to be told, "We’ve tried that before. It won’t work."
A manager only points out problems instead of celebrating progress.
A teammate expresses excitement about a project, but gets met with rolling eyes or dismissive comments.
In time, people stop speaking up altogether. Rather than defaulting to doubt, what if we asked, "That’s interesting — how do you think we can make it work?" It’s a small shift that can change the whole atmosphere.
In School: Crushing Curiosity
Students grow when their curiosity is encouraged. Yet the wet blanket effect often sneaks into classrooms:
A creative answer gets mocked instead of discussed.
A student excited about a project gets teased for "trying too hard."
Someone asks a question, and classmates make them feel stupid for it.
If negativity takes root, students stop asking, stop engaging, and stop dreaming. Instead, let’s celebrate curiosity and create spaces where every question and idea is valued.
In Church: Killing the Spirit of Encouragement
Even in church — a place meant for faith, hope, and love — the wet blanket effect can creep in:
Someone shares a testimony, and it’s brushed off as coincidence instead of God's blessing.
A new believer is passionate about serving, but is met with cynicism: “We’ve seen your type. You’ll get tired soon.”
Someone struggling in their faith receives judgment instead of compassion.
The Bible urges us in 1 Thessalonians 5:11: “Therefore encourage one another and build each other up.” Imagine the strength of a community where encouragement is the default.
Stopping the Wet Blanket Effect
The wet blanket effect isn’t just about what we say — it’s how we say it. Being realistic is important, but it should never come at the cost of crushing someone's spirit.
Next time you’re tempted to react negatively, pause and ask yourself:
✔️ Am I offering helpful feedback or just shooting them down?
✔️ Am I building up or tearing down?
✔️ How would I feel if I heard what I'm about to say?
Let’s choose to be fire starters, people who ignite confidence, fuel passion, and spread encouragement everywhere we go.
Let’s create spaces where people feel safe to dream, speak up, and grow.
I’d love to hear your thoughts. Have you ever experienced the wet blanket effect? Have you ever, maybe unknowingly, been a wet blanket to someone else?
Let’s talk about it.