Wow, this really hit deep. Thank you for sharing this, Joe.
Honestly, I lost my footing in prayer for a long time. I got so caught up in the religious noise, doing all the right things on the outside but slowly drifting on the inside. It was like I got comfortable being distant from God and didn’t even realize how far I’d gone.
At first, it didn’t feel like anything was wrong. I felt like I was strong enough to handle life on my own. I kept moving, showing up, acting like I had it together. But at some point, everything just… cracked. My strength couldn’t carry me anymore.
I got so disappointed at life, at myself… it felt like I was drowning quietly. There were days I legit thought maybe checking out would just be easier. But then, the fear of hell? That one no gree me. Everything just felt so heavy and uncertain. And even with people around me, I felt like I was all by myself. I had gotten so used to being “the strong one” that nobody knew I was falling apart.
Then one random afternoon, I got home, shut the door, and without even thinking, I just said “Father...”, and I broke down.
No fancy words, no prayer points, nothing. Just tears. Groanings. Silence.
But somehow… in that messy moment, I felt peace again. Not a loud one, just a calm that made me breathe a little deeper. I found my way back. Slowly, quietly.
And now I know, I’m not strong in myself anymore. I can’t even pretend. I’m only standing because of Christ.
So yeah, this post really brought back that moment for me. Thank you for putting this into words. We really don’t have to be perfect or have it all figured out… sometimes, we just need to start with one word. Or even just tears.
Wow, this really hit deep. Thank you for sharing this, Joe.
Honestly, I lost my footing in prayer for a long time. I got so caught up in the religious noise, doing all the right things on the outside but slowly drifting on the inside. It was like I got comfortable being distant from God and didn’t even realize how far I’d gone.
At first, it didn’t feel like anything was wrong. I felt like I was strong enough to handle life on my own. I kept moving, showing up, acting like I had it together. But at some point, everything just… cracked. My strength couldn’t carry me anymore.
I got so disappointed at life, at myself… it felt like I was drowning quietly. There were days I legit thought maybe checking out would just be easier. But then, the fear of hell? That one no gree me. Everything just felt so heavy and uncertain. And even with people around me, I felt like I was all by myself. I had gotten so used to being “the strong one” that nobody knew I was falling apart.
Then one random afternoon, I got home, shut the door, and without even thinking, I just said “Father...”, and I broke down.
No fancy words, no prayer points, nothing. Just tears. Groanings. Silence.
But somehow… in that messy moment, I felt peace again. Not a loud one, just a calm that made me breathe a little deeper. I found my way back. Slowly, quietly.
And now I know, I’m not strong in myself anymore. I can’t even pretend. I’m only standing because of Christ.
So yeah, this post really brought back that moment for me. Thank you for putting this into words. We really don’t have to be perfect or have it all figured out… sometimes, we just need to start with one word. Or even just tears.
Thank you for sharing this.
I truly felt every word. It’s a powerful reminder that we don’t have to be perfect or have it all together. God just wants our honesty.
I’m really glad you found your way back and that peace found you in that moment.
You’re not alone.